Long Story Short

Well seeing as it has been almost a year since I last posted I figured my first post back should be a quick overview of the past few months. So this is my LONG STORY SHORT!

 I moved back to North Carolina in December of 2012 and said a tearful good-bye to my youth at Boys Hope Girls Hope. After a year an a half with those amazing teenagers it was really hard to leave but it was wonderful to be back in my home state.

I came back to NC as an Aunt. My older brother and his wonderful wife had a beautiful baby boy, who is now 9 months only and in 2T clothing. I call him baby hulk because he is strong and smart just like his parents. I am resisting the urge to post pictures so that when he is older he doesn't hate me for posting baby pictures all over the internet. I am also excited to be an Aunt of a niece this coming Holiday season. Basically I came back at a perfect time.

I also came back to a wonderful new job. I was very lucky to start my job as a Discipleship Coordinator at St. Paul United Methodist Church. One of my primary jobs (and one of my favorites) is being the youth director. I LOVE IT! This is a picture of our 2013 New Years Eve Lock-In. The  youth group continues to grow in number and in faith. I am so blessed that their parents share them with me and I love being able to help them grow spiritually.

Then God opened a door that I was not expecting. Basically God laid down all the puzzle pieces and asked me to be fearlessly faithful and I am trying my best to keep up. This started with being accepted and attending (and completing) Duke Divinity. No I am not getting ordained. However, I am getting a Master's of Arts in Christian Practice which will help me continue to do ministry with a better theological understanding.

Then God asked me and my family to be more fearlessly faithful then we have ever been before, He asked my family to rely on Him more then ever and to truly give Him our worries and fears. In July my Dad was diagnosed with a terminal cancer, he has Neuroendocrine Carcinoids. (I am sure you could get a better explanation if you googled it then me giving you a explanation.) So needless to say my world has be truly rocked. Although we know that God did not give him the cancer we are relying on Him to support us through. You can read his story on his blog at www.martycauley.org. The story starts in July.

So that is my Long Story Short. I will be trying to blog more often as I am about to embark on a journey unlike any I thought I would go on. However, I know that no matter how difficult this journey will be the Lord is with me and He is asking me to be fearlessly faithful and although I fail, I will continue to strive to be fearlessly faithful.

Love and Peace,
Lydia

Needy

Tis the season of giving! Around this time of year people become very generous and give time, food, clothing, money and much more. You cannot throw a rock without hitting some kind of drive for the "needy." As we become engrossed with the holiday season by giving thanks for the things we have we also begin helping the "needy." As I hear that term more and more this holiday season I begin to realize how much I hate that word .

Webster.com defines needy as 1) being in want: poverty-stricken  2) marked by want of affection, attention, or emotional support.

So who get's to determine who the needy is? Are we not all needy? Doesn't everyone WANT? I know that someone is rolling their eyes at me said "it's just a choice of words." Exactly, isn't the choice of words everything. A certain choice of words can invoke a particular kind of feeling. Maybe needy is to invoke in people to give, but doesn't it also sound a bit degrading. How many people have you met have ever said "i'm needy?" Probably, no one because the term is met with such a negative connotation. I've never heard anyone say they want to be the needy friend, or needy girl/boyfriend. So instead we use it to explain someone's economic situation?

We are all needy, we all need God's love. One of the greatest things about God is that he loves freely, he will offer you as much affection, attention, and emotional support than anyone else. We give to those less fortunate, but we are all needy.

I love the holidays because of how much people give to each other. Just please do not confuse needy with those in need of essentials because in Gods eyes we are all needy.

Why Volunteer?

When I graduated in May of 2011 I had many paths I could have embarked on. I chose to “take a year off” and volunteer a year of my life to AmeriCorps. I chose a program that would take me out of my comfort zone and out of North Carolina. I have always loved my home but I wanted to challenge myself and move away.

I found Boys Hope Girls Hope in AmeriCorps list of programs involving youth. The “official” description is:

“Boys Hope Girls Hope is an academic scholarship program for underprivileged youth in the metro Detroit area. Our program recognizes that children have the desire to be successful but social and economic stressors could hinder their ability to succeed. Education is the key to breaking the cycle of poverty and we provide the best private education to our scholars. We empower our scholars to realize their potential by supporting them academically, emotionally, spiritually and financially. Children generally come to us at a young age and remain members of our extended family for life.” [1]

After applying to the program and completing a couple of interviews I was accepted to become and Academic Success Corps member. Then after a couple of more interviews I was asked to be the ASC for Boys Hope Girls Hope Detroit.

The population of Detroit is 706,585 (Raleigh is 416.468 people) and the percentage of that population that is below the poverty line is 34.5%.[2] The 2010 graduation rate from Detroit Public Schools was about 62%, which is up from 59% in 2009. The dropout rate in 2010 was about 19%[3]. 

          

So with those statistics in mind I moved from North Carolina to Detroit, Michigan. I didn’t move to save the world. I didn’t move to save Detroit. I moved to try and make an impact in a small group of teenagers. As an ASC I have assisted with homework, planned college tours, worked with scholars on college and scholarship applications, encouraged them to read for fun, and pushed them to see that college is in their future. Some of the scholars enter the program thinking they will never get to college; when they are in to the program we help them see that not only are they going to attend college but they will graduate college.

However, even with all the academic things I help with it’s the moments in between that have made this all worth it. The little moments like eating dinner together, or doing Zumba in the basement, playing Uno or just talking in the car. It’s the moment when one of my seniors gets into her first choice school, or the look on her face when she knocks on my door at 11:30pm to tell me her ACT score went up 2 points. It’s the moment when you see the light bulb go off in a scholar. It is these moments that make the stress, frustration, and exhaustion worth it. 

I volunteered with AmeriCorp to get out of my bubble and in return I fell in love with a group of youth who changed my life.

---

[1] http://www.boyshopegirlshope.org/

[2] Information from http://quickfacts.census.gov/qfd/states/26/2622000.html

[3] http://detroitk12.org/content/2011/02/22/dps-reaches-62-percent-graduation-rate-the-highest-since-state-began-new-cohort-methodology-in-2007/

End of Your Comfort Zone

 “Life begins at the end of your comfort zone”

 –Neale Donald Walsch

We are all faced with uncomfortable situations at some point in our lives. It might be physically, emotionally, spiritually, or just generally we have all be there. I know that you have been uncomfortable because you either have or will go through puberty and let’s just be honest that is uncomfortable for all of us.

However, how many times have you purposely put yourself in an uncomfortable situation? It is human nature for us to fall into a pattern. However, when we live our lives in a pattern we inadvertently push away the things that make us feel uncomfortable. Those commercials that talk about starving children we flip the channel, the ASPCA commercials we flip the channel…why? It might be because the images combined with Sarah McLaughlin singing “Angel” but it is also because it makes us feel uncomfortable.

It is not just life that begins at the end of your comfort zone. God’s plan for you is at the end of your comfort zone. At Catalyst 2012 Graig Groeschel talked about “certain uncertainty.” You destiny is at the end of uncertainty; your life is at the end of your comfort zone.

“To step towards your destiny, you have to step away from your security”

–Graig Groeschel

In order for you to do God’s work you have to go out of the comfort zone. You have to go to those that are hungry, go to those that are in need, go to those who do not know God. God does not say “sit stay and be comfortable” he says “go and make disciples of all nations.” Matthew 28:19

Let God make a disciple out of you and do something on purpose that makes you uncomfortable. Step away from the security, step out of the box, and find what God has in waiting for you. 

To plant...

1 There is a time for everything and a season for every activity under the heavens: 
2 a time to be born and a time to die, 
   a time to plant and a time to uproot,

My friend and coworker was planting blubs of flowers yesterday, in the dark, before a storm. I asked her why we plant them now, she explained to me it's better to plant now so by spring they will be rooted and before a storm so that they settle.

Andy Stanley said "God does his best shaping and making during adversity."Just like these flowers God is going to root us more through the storm, the snow, the dreary weather of our lives more than the colorful, bright, cleared sky of our lives. It is during these times of Spring we begin to forget that we need God, that we need him in every decision, every move we make, every flower, and every cloud.

God has shaped me more in the past year then ever before, because I leaned on him. Every little prayer, every moment of silence, every inch of patience I received even after my patience was gone was from Him because God shapes us the most during adversity. When I am discouraged, tired to the core, upset, ready to quit He is there pushing me. Before this experience I did not realize how much I forgot about Him and it makes me feel so ashamed, but I know that is one of the main reasons i'm here.

You Can't Buy God

I love Toms shoes, in fact I own two pair. They are my favorite because they are comfortable, washable, fun, and they make me smile every time I put them on. If you are not familiar with the Toms shoe brand they are shoe and now glasses company that follows the one for one campaign. You buy one pair of shoes or glasses, and they give one pair of shoe or glasses to children in need. Some people say they are two expensive my response is well I bought two pair, one for me and one for a friend.

Charity Water! An organization dedicated to building wells and bringing clean water to communities in need. They asked for people to donate their birthdays! Instead of asking for objects or money they want you to donate water. By setting up your own Charity Water page and allowing people to donate online. The organization promises 100% of the funds raised go to the water campaigns and they fundraise for the business ends, brilliant idea.

ZOE ministries, or Zimbabwe Orphan Endeavor, is dedicated to helping communities in Africa buy building school houses, providing farming skills and animals, and much more. During their seasonal “Gifts that Grow” you can purchase a farm animal to give to a community. The community learns how to care for those animals and it becomes a sustainable source of income and food for the community.

These organizations along with many more like them are doing great things but it is not enough to buy what they are selling because we can't buy God. It isn't enough to believe in what they are doing, we have to do good.

Ecclesiastes 3:12
I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to DO GOOD while they live.

Giving money and buying products that help good is great but God tells us that we are to "be happy and DO GOOD." You can't just stop after you buy a pair of shoes, and a goat for a village.

As a society we have become lazy thinking that if we go to church, give our tithe, and give a little more for some side projects our job is done. We get to caught up in the Product.

We cannot be bothered to take one of our only days off to try and go to a soup kitchen, we would have to call and find a time. Our lives are to busy for the Process.

We make excuses..i'm tired, I need to do laundry, I tithed this week, it's my only day off, someone else will do it. You are holding yourself back. Person

(I stole Product, Process, Person from Marty Cauley's leadership legal pad)

I am just as guilty! Since I have dedicated over a year to being an AmeriCrops member in Detroit I often have these thoughts that "that is enough." The truth is it is never enough for our God. Our God who gave his only son to die on the cross for our sins and we are to self involved to get up on our one day to sleep in to go do exactly was he told us..."DO GOOD!"

We can not sit on the sideline any longer. We can no longer sit in our rocking chairs talking the talk, no more "bless her heart" we need to go out and have our hearts be blessed by Him. We have to put on our Toms and walk in them toward the messes!

Andy Stanley said at Catalyst 2012 "The greatest thing you do may not be what you do, but when someone watches you do what you do." You may get discouraged thinking "I cannot change the world I am only one person" but what if someone saw you going out there "walking the walk?" Then they decided to walk with you, then someone else, then someone else.

Some 250,000 people attended the Civil Rights March on Washington...it started with a walk.

We Work for Hope

We Work for Hope

I apologize that it has been over a year since I posted. I wanted to start back up for a couple of reasons. One is that some other blogs that I'm currently following have inspired me to pick it back up and try and stick with it. Also because after working at Boys Hope Girls Hope for over a year has inspired me and I feel that I need to reflect on my time here. 

Why Hope

I wanted to explain the name change. I changed "We Work for Less" to "We Work for Hope" because I have been living out hope all year, more so then living less. Also because some people have inspired me recently that have inspired me. 

In my friend's blog (Cameron) she talks about hope, which is when the reflection started. In her blog as well as Katie Davis's they speak on a scripture...

"Return to to you fortress, you prisoners of hope." Zechariah 9:12 and it got me thinking..."prisoner of hope." 

Hope has been a reoccurring theme in my life this year and I  have continuously passed over the term in my day to day life. I work for an organization with HOPE in the name, I looked into volunteering at an organization in Africa call Door of Hope. God has been throwing it in my face and I, being selfish in my own day to day routine, passed it over without a second glance! However, today I see it! I hear it...I AM A PRISONER OF HOPE! 

My passion for youth comes from me being a "prisoner of hope." Normally when we think prisoner it is met with a negative cogitation. We think of people being "locked up" or being prisoners of war. Dictionary.com defines it as "a person or thing that is deprived of liberty or kept in restraint" but when you are a "prisoner of hope" you are only restrained by knowledge that God is going to push you to go outside of your comfort zone. God is going to push you to HOPE, to hope to feed the hungry, to hope to heal the sick, hope to BE the church. 

God doesn't want us to dream he wants us to hope. Some dreams never come true but our hopes we can do something about. Hope means "the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best." Hopes can be put into action. Muhammad Gandhi said "be the change you wish to see in the world" he didn't say dream it he said be it. Hope is the bridge between dreams and reality, between "dreaming it" and "being it." I am not saying we should not dream. I think we need to dream and dream BIG. Dreams are often where our hopes derive from. However, to be God's "prisoner of hope" we have to be willing to serve him with our every fiber of our being, we have to be willing to let our hopes lead us out of our comfort zone. To have our hopes take us to Detroit, or Africa, or around the corner, or anywhere that we see that our hope can flourish. 

"Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things" -Shawshank Redemption

Twas a night before Thanksgiving

Twas a night before Thanksgiving, when all through the house 

Every creature was stirring, except for the mouse

The Turkey was marinating in the Kitchen with care

In hope that the family would notice it there

The children were nestled all snug in their sweaters

Waiting to send their Santa letters

And mamma in her apron, and I in my chefs hat

Had just settled down when we heard a pitter-pat

From the living room there arose such a clatter
I sprang from the kitchen to see what was the matter
Away to the Christmas tree I flew like a flash
Only to see it fall with a clash

There stood a puppy, so lively and quick,
The puppy came over and gave me a lick.

-This Thanksgiving parody by Lydia Cauley :)

Pictures

*This picture is from my Uncle Paul, from a morning run in LA

"It is because the human spirit knows, deep down, that all lives intersect. That death doesn't just take someone, it misses someone else, and in the small distance between being taken and being missed, lives are changed" 
-the Five people you meet in Heaven

"I always wondered why birds choose to stay in the same place when they can fly anywhere on the earth...then I asked myself the same question" -Unknown

I am a planner!

I am a planner! I always have been alway will be. I want to fix things when something unexpected comes up but I think I need to learn to let it ride.

Matthew 6:26

“Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable then they?" 

Are you not much more valuable then they? 

I’m beginning to think about what a friend told me years ago. We were talking about over analyzing things. What if the reason we over analyze things is not because we’re planning for something but because we can’t let go of something else? She said we plan because our thoughts and plans are the only company we have because friends and families are unreliable.

I disagree.

I think we plan because we want to control our futures, but our futures are already planned for us. The paths are they we just have to decide to choose the right one. Our friends and families are what keeps us company and help us through out paths.

We are more valuable then the birds, God lays down our paths and we are but humble servants to his will. If you told me a year ago that I would be in Detroit, Michigan I would have thought you were out of your mind, but I guess God had other plans for me! So I will continue to push through the not so good days because this is where God planned for me to be!

A title

Disclaimer: this post is less about my current work as a volunteer. This post is more of a reflection in general

I became a stage manager for the first time by accident. My high school had a new theatre teacher and I was the only one who approached him at the beginning of the new school year, thus began my fall into the rabbit hole of theatre.

For those of you who do not know a much about theatre Wikipedia defines a stage manager as "practice of organizing and coordinating a theatrical production. It encompasses a variety of activities, including organizing the production and coordinating communications between various personnel (e.g., between director and backstage crew, or actors and production management)."

The first time I was placed in a management role at UNCA was when I was selected to be the Assistant Stage Manager for Urinetown, under Lisa. Lisa was my inspiration with continuing in management and without her guidance in the beginning I do believe I would not have been half the stage manager that people say I am. I owe many thanks to her!

A title does not earn you respect, you do!

The title “Stage Manager” does not automatically earn you respects. The title does nothing define your job. Although any respectable actor or crew member will give a certain amount of respect to the person who is the stage manager out of professionalism but the rest must be earned. A person is defined by their actions not their title. I may call myself a stage manager but how can I expect respect from an actor if I am continuously late, don’t know the answer to any of their questions, or simple to not follow through on things I will say I do. This may all see to be common sense but what I have learned is that many people expect respect because of the title they wear.

This does not just pertain to theatre, but to anywhere. A director of an organization does not receive full respect because of the title, but of the actions while under that title. Now I am not saying that in a position of authority means having to be liked by everyone. I have worked with many people did not like me, or that I did not like but that did not mean I did no give or receive the respect earned.

Just because you have a title that implies leadership, it does not in fact make you a leader.

The thin line between professional and peer!

Another thing I learned while being a stage manager is that the hardest thing is to work in a position that has authority over your peers. I understand fully that being a stage manager in a university theatre is vastly different from that of a professional theatre. One of those main differences being that I have classes with the same people in the show, I am friends with them, I go out with them, and we know personal things about each other. So one of the hardest things is walking that thin line between professional stage manager and friend. Now I have been told my professors and bosses that I do a pretty good job of walking that line. However, I am my biggest critic and in hindsight I see how I could have handled situations differently.

The invisible line is also different with every person. For instance, my friend Cassidy, we have worked in many different areas together and I know that I can say something to her in a professional since (even if it may be a criticism or correction) and she will not take in personally. In fact she was one of the many people that I could also go to professionally and personally and ask, “how can I improve?” because she would tell me the truth and knew that I would accept the criticism with openness to improve.

To many times in theatre and in life do we take someone’s criticisms personally, could it not be that person’s comments were to help and not hurt? I understand that it may be in our human nature to defend our actions but sometimes the best way to improve ourselves is simply by listing to criticism with an open mind.

This I believe

NPR has a serious called "This I Believe," it is a series of essays describing core values that guide people all over the world through their daily lives. To here some of them you can check out

http://thisibelieve.org/

I bring this up because one of the returning Academic Success Corp Volunteers (the title of my volunteer job, however she is from a different affiliate) brought these essays to our attention during orientation. She challenged us to write up our own and at the end of the week we shared them as a group. As I was driving home I began to think of one that I wanted to share.

I Believe in the 13 hour day...

I believe in the 13 hour day, you know those days where you wake up and hit the ground running! The days where you do not stop until you hit the bed again that night. I believe in those 13 hour days.

I believe that at the end of my 13 hour day I may be upset or even a little angry, but when I lay in my bed surrounded by the silence those emotions will fade and I will remember why I am doing this. I am dedicating my 13 hour days to these teenagers so that one day they will have a future that they would not have had otherwise.

I believe that one day the scholars will appreciate how many people dedicated multiple 13 hour days to them. As teenagers they do not appreciate it today and they will not appreciate it tomorrow or even next week, but one day they will. I believe one day when these teenagers are older they will dedicate a 13 hour day to someone they care for, someone they are fighting for, someone that they are dedicated to and they will appreciate the 13 hour days that people dedicated to them.

I realize now that many people dedicated their 13 hour days to me and those people may have never been properly thanked. So I thank you Teachers, Professors, Mothers, Fathers, Brothers, Sisters, Directors, Techies, Actors, Friends, Colleagues, Ministers, Youth Workers, and everyone else who has ever dedicated a 13 hour day to me and who ever does in the future.

I believe in the 13 hour day!

Moving away from Home

Moving out of North Carolina was a very large step for me. I had never lived out of the state before and I had never 

lived so far away from my family. Now don't get me wrong I have lived far away from them before, I went to college 4-6 hours away from them (it was dependent on the parent). However, I have never lived 10 hours away from them. So from living in North Carolina all my life to living in Detroit, Michigan is a very big change.

I have been here for about 2 and a half months and after many challenges I have faced within the organization, with the scholars, and with the administration I began to doubt if this is really where I was supposed to be. I began to miss the constant presence of my family and friends, I am in now way lacking support, but their presence is what I am missing. Not to mention that Detroit is a hard city, it is going through a lot of economic issues and for lack of a better work it is not pretty. I was beginning to become more homesick then I have ever been in my entire life. I began to nonchalantly look at other opportunities.

I began to struggle more and more with if this is where God wanted me to be? Is this where I wanted to be? So after speaking with both my parents and my best friend I took my Father's advice, he is a Reverend. He told me to pray for either another door to open or for a sign, and if a sign were to appear to give me strength. So I prayed, and a sign is what I got today. A sign in the mail from my best friends Mother Beth. It was a necklace and a note, but I was immediately given the calming sensation that this is where I am supposed to be.

Oh how God works in mysterious ways!

Chicago

So I went to Chicago for the first time to visit the Chicago Affiliate and to also be a tourist.

Understanding the difference between affiliates in Boys Hope Girls Hope was an eye opening experience. 

First Steps

First Steps
So before I get into the first steps of what I did on the job I have to tell you a little about how I go here. I drove my car from North Carolina to Detroit,MI and some things I learned on the way were...
1)Virginia is not kidding about their speed limits, there were signs, and cops every where
2)West Virginia has a lot of construction, but here is the thing no one is actually working where it says there is construction
3)Ohio there are no cops and the Ohio turnpike is straight and boring but there is a Panera Bread company at one of the stops.
4)Michigan the drivers go a little crazy, and in Detroit it seems that people follow their own rules. However, as crazy as they are if a light is out they are the calmest drivers i've ever seen. 


Oh yes but my story...so on the way to Detroit Michigan I accidentally made a little detour...to Canada. That is right CANADA. My GPS and I got into a minor argument because it was asking me to go on roads that were blocked with construction next thing I am going through what I think is a toll booth and in actuality is a payment to go into Canada. Before I realize what is going on I'm on the bridge unable to turn around. I get up to the guy with no passport and explain to him that I need to take the biggest U turn of my life. The guy a Canada giggled and let me through no big deal, the guy in the US gave me so much crap. Asked me if I had a gun about 11 times. No sir I do not but do you really think I would just say "Oh yes sir I do, would you like to confiscate it and arrest me?" Needless to say I paid $8 ($4 in and $4 out) to spend about 20minutes in Canada. I laughed throughout the whole thing and still think it is ridiculous. 

We Work For Less

How it all started!
Not a lot of 20 something people would jump at the opportunity to dedicate their life to an organization for basically no money. In fact when I tell people that is what i'm doing I generally get a very puzzled look. However, on the flip side of that I also get the "your a saint" response. The fact is I did it for several reasons, 1) I didn't want to go to Grad school right away 2) I didn't want to find myself stuck a job that I didn't like and 3) I didn't really know what else to do. So here I am!


I have moved from North Carolina to Detroit, Michigan. I've been here for about a month and half. All I can say is it is like living in another world. No cities in NC even come close to the size that Detroit is. I also wanted to do this experience to see if I really loved North Carolina or if I was just staying inside my comfort zone...my bubble. Turns our I really do like North Carolina. 


We Work for Less!
Now I named this We Work for Less because i'm a full time volunteer. Now i'm not making no money, I get a "big girl allowance" and an educational stipend at the end of my service to help chip away at my mountains of loans from school. My organization provides room and board so that is nice. If you really want the dollar per house amount with out calculating the cost of room and board I make about $4 a hour, so I'm not doing this for the money. So the point of this blog is to document my adventures through Detroit, Michigan and my experience as a full time volunteer. Oh, and the other thing that adds to this experience is that my organization is a residential program for youth, currently we have all teenagers. 8 to be exact, this is not to mention the community program that also has 8. So here I am 22 years old and i've dedicated a year of my life to trying my best to help 16 inner city kids take the steps to get into college, an opportunity that some of them didn't realize was possible until they got accepted into this program. 


So here we go...keep in mind i'm starting this a little late so the next blog will be a catch up of some of the things that have happened in that month.